Bitter Hearts (A Southern Loving Book 3) Read online

  Bitter Hearts

  Ava Thorn

  Copyright © 2014 Ava Thorn

  All Rights Reserved

  Prologue

  The beeping of the cell phone caused Hank to wake up from his slumber. He could hear the shower running in the bathroom as his wife, Natalie, sang off key. He closed his eyes and tried to get a little more shut eye before he got up and checked on the stables, and before the impending storm rolls in. The beep sounded again, groaning he reached for the device that was disturbing his sleep. With eyes half closed, he looked at the phone.

  Hank saw something that didn’t want to see. Sitting up in bed, he scanned the text messages from his wife to another person. But it wasn’t just any person, it was man that Hank knew well enough to refer to as a friend.

  Natalie: Thank you for a wonderful evening. Can’t wait to see you tomorrow.

  Replier: your plane ticket is ready at the counter waiting for you.

  Natalie: Great. I can’t wait to run into your arms.

  Replier: Did you tell him yet? I know you’re still married to Hank, but you need to tell him it’s over.

  Replier: Are you gonna ignore me?

  Hank’s head started to spin as he continued to read the very sexually explicated emails and text messages. Natalie even sent naked pictures to him. He couldn’t fathom laying in the bed, where they’d just made love. Walking out the bedroom, he made his way to the living room where he sat down and stared at the wedding portraits on the mantel.

  I tried for the longest to make this a home, he said to himself. Hank was starting to realize that no matter what he did, Natalie wouldn’t be happy or satisfied with him. They say “A picture is worth a thousand words,” when he looked at the wedding photos displayed around the house, Hank saw love, happiness and happily ever after. If someone reincarnated their picture perfect day at this moment in time, the telltale signs of hurt, anger and disappointment would reflect in the picture.

  Divorce wasn’t in his vocabulary; he detested even letting the word form on his lips. For the past couple of months, he watched the sweet, loving woman he fell in love with become this distant monster. She was sabotaging everyone around them, maybe it was her plan to make everyone dislike her. Hank continued to sit by the fireplace; he could hear shuffling in the back room. Not bothering to get up, he just sat there waiting.

  He could hear Natalie walking around, doors opening and closing. Her muffle voice talking on a cellphone. Hank had to ask himself if she was talking him, the man she having an affair with.

  Sitting in the rocking chair, he racked his brains on how to save his marriage. Should he beg and plead with her to salvage their marriage? Hank had to ask himself the hardest question that he would ever have to face. Was Natalie worth fighting for?

  Looking up from his spot in the dark corner, unnoticed, he watched his wife, the woman who was the apple of his eyes, as she walked into the living room with her luggage. Natalie Jackson had fiery red hair just like her attitude, and soft, creamy white skin that could put a baby bottom to shame. When he first laid eyes on the green eye beauty, Hank was smitten with her on day one.

  “Where are you going?” he asked, his deep voice starling her.

  Natalie twirled around quickly with her hand to her chest. “Dammit, Hank you scared me.”

  Hank’s eyes were glued to the Gucci luggage beside Natalie. “Where are you going?” he repeated.

  “I-I Hank, going to go see my mother and father in Tyler, Texas.” Natalie’s voice trailed off as she fingered the strap of her purse.

  “I have a few days coming up,” he paused looking at her, “I’ll go with you and we can make a weekend of it.”

  “I can’t- Mama is sick and daddy’s losing his mind. I told them I’d be on the first flight back home,” she purred.

  Natalie was standing in front of him lying about her mother being sick, just to go lay up with some Tom Dick or Harry. Hank was having a hard time controlling his anger. Counting to ten wasn’t going to control his outburst.

  “For God’s sake, you’re going to stand up here and freaking lie!” He jerked his head towards the front door. “I know you leaving me to go see him.”

  Yeah they had problems, but there had to be a way to make their marriage work. He was optimistic that there was a way to savage their relationship. When things got rough, people didn’t abandon their spouse, they stayed to work it out. Hank saw no remorse or commitment in her eyes.

  Natalie looked over at the man she’d been married to for the past three years, who was trying to keep his emotions in check. His grey eyes appeared to be heavy and emotional; his brown shaggy hair appeared tussled. Hank was still handsome as ever, with his sun-kissed skin from working long hours out in the sun on the ranch. His body was toned and muscular from lifting bales of hay every day. What most people didn’t know about Hank Jackson was that he could sing, he had potential but would never do anything with it. That was another reason she was leaving him, he was satisfied with being the help, and she had bigger plans for herself.

  Licking her lips, Natalie took a deep breath before saying, “I’m leaving you…We’re not happy anymore. People change, I changed.” She flipped her hair back and avoided eye contact. “I’m not that woman who you married. When we got together, you were this hot-shot country singer and now you’re the cowboy that shovels horse shit.”

  The words that came out of her mouth were harsh; it hurt to know how she could think so little of him, as a man.

  “I left the music scene because it was what you wanted. Nat, you thought I was out there sleeping with groupies left and right. Yeah I left stage life for you…for us, with hopes of us starting our own family.” Hank thought she would welcome the change of scenery. He was home every night, and showered her with love and attention.

  “I’m tired, there is something missing with us,” Natalie sighed. “I want a divorce.”

  The room was so quiet that you could hear a pin needle drop.

  “Dwight?” Hank asked. His deep voice was hard and cold, he glance over to Natalie’s finger, her wedding ring was gone, just like the sex in their marriage. He should’ve seen they were headed in this direction, the distance between was too big. “How long you been seeing him?” His cousin had been telling him for the longest time, that he needed to open his eyes and see Natalie for exactly who she was.

  “Fine! I’m moving out.” There was no hesitation, it seemed like his wife had her mind made up.

  He searched her eyes for love and saw none for him. “What are you saying?” he asked.

  “I’m unhappy and miserable. I have contacted a lawyer and already filed for divorce.” Natalie shifted slightly from one foot to the other.

  Hank stared at the designer luggage that sat in the middle of the living room. Standing up from the chair he walked over to her.

  “I love you, it doesn’t make any sense. Whatever problems there are between us, I’m sure we can work it out.” He touched her arm, but she pulled away.

  Natalie laughed at him and shook her head. “I’m in love with him.”

  He stood there frozen in time; his wife just threw his life and their marriage for a loop. She wasn’t in love with him anymore, but with another man. His eyes drifted to the overstuffed luggage.

  There were so many things that he could’ve said, but instead Hank gripped the handle of the luggage.

  “What are you doing?” she shrieked.

  Hank walked towards the front door pulling the luggage with him. He knew the favorite saying most people say when life can feel horrible at times, “Everything happens for a reason.” Hank’s mother, Kate, swore by the belief and that’s what he believed thr
oughout his life. In the game of life, in order to fight your way out of a tiring situation, you had to keep peace and hope. He wasn’t going to keep loving someone who didn’t return love. It was time to set Natalie free and himself.

  “You’re letting me leave?” she asked, following him.

  “What do you want me to do?” He put her luggage into the trunk of the car. “I’m not going to beg you stay.”

  “I…thought you would at least-”

  “What? Get on my hands and knees?” He slammed the trunk down, looked at Natalie and shook his head. “I’m not what you need, remember? Why stick around with a washed up country singer, who plays farmer Joe.”

  Hank tossed all those words she told him during arguments.

  Natalie appeared shocked over the change of events, she didn’t think that Hank would accepted the divorce with ease. “How could you let me go?”

  He looked at the woman that he would have crossed any mountain or river to be with. “I was prepared to plead with you not to leave. There’s nothing I wouldn’t have done for you, but you taught me that I can’t make you happy. Natalie, we both deserve to be happy and one day you will realize that you’re responsible for your own happiness. It’s not about the mansion, cars or the money in the bank account. Whoever he is that your leaving me for, will teach you that soon enough.”

  “You don’t know nothing about him,” she snapped, pointing her long manicured nail at him.

  “I guess it’s true what they say,” he said, taking a seat on the brick steps. Hank could hear the rumbling of thunder in the distance.

  “What’s that?” she demanded with her hands on her hips.

  “Good guys finish last. I’m not a cheater, alcoholic, slacker, or abuser. I’m a good man who made sure that my home was taking care of, and that my wife had everything she needed and more. A loyal husband.”

  “Dwight gives me everything that you don’t.” Natalie flipped her red hair back, her attitude was nonchalant. “I made a mistake thinking that Nashville could be good for us.”

  It was good for you, he wanted to say. They moved to Nashville to take over the ranching responsibilities at Southern Hearts Ranch. Shit, Tennessee was the place where she broke his heart and fell in love with another man.

  “Bye Natalie.” He could see lightning skittering about in the distance.

  “I never wanted to hurt you,” she said. Pushing her purse onto her shoulder, Natalie looked at him one more time, before getting inside her car and driving away with his heart.

  Hank felt the first few droplets on his head as he stared at the Natalie’s car, until the red taillights vanish into the night. He continued to sit there until water began to plummet down from the heavens. Closing his eyes, he tried to wrap his head around how someone who claimed to love him hurt him and ripped his heart out.

  He sat there until he was soaking wet, he didn’t know how long he sat there on the hard brick steps. Maybe it was until his cousin, Austin McBride, and his wife, Farrah, pulled up in a red Ford truck. It sickened him as he watched the newly, happy married couple walk over to him. His cousin Austin was his best friend, when his mother and father passed away Austin’s mom and dad took him in, raising Hank like he was their son. Austin became the doting husband and father to be, with Farrah, the love he had for the woman shined brightly in those bright blue eyes of his.

  “Are you okay?” Farrah held an umbrella over her head. “Why don’t you come back to the main house with us?”

  Hank saw why his cousin fell in love with Farrah Rue, not only did she prepare the best meal, but she was beautiful inside and out, which was hard to come by these days. Her curly black hair flowed to her shoulder, her brown skin contain that pregnancy glow. Kneeling down, she touched his arm, when he looked into her eyes he didn’t see pity, he saw reassurance and that everything would get better in due time.

  “I’m okay, I just need to catch my breath,” Hank mumbled.

  “Farrah, why don’t you go inside? I don’t need you catching a cold,” Austin said.

  “Okay,” she said in a soft voice. Leaning forwards she planted a kiss on Hank’s forehead. She moved passed him and walked into the house leaving the guys to talk.

  “What happen?” Austin asked, taking a seat next to Hank. It didn’t bother him that it was raining so hard.

  “She left me for another man. I don’t know what I was doing wrong.” Hank ran his fingers threw his dirty blonde hair. “I love her and if she came back right now...I’ll take her back in a heartbeat.”

  “No you wouldn’t. Remember when you told me that Rebecca wasn’t the one for me? It took me a minute to realize that but I got there after a lot of reflection.”

  Hank couldn’t listen to Austin at this moment, especially with his world crumbling down at his feet. He was a big mess as rage, shock, and sadness rocked his body. For the first time in years, he felt lonelier than he could have ever felt.

  “Don’t give me none of that BS about once a cheater always a cheater, because look at you,” Hank mumbled, looking over at his cousin who wore a shocked expression. Austin didn’t have any room to talk about Natalie, simply because he cheated on his fiancée, Rebecca, with the chef who was supposed to cater the wedding of the century.

  “Yeah, what I did was fucked up,” his said slowly. “I caused Rebecca some pain, and I hate that I did that.” Austin took off his cowboy hair and placed it next to him. He looked up at the dark sky, as rain pour down on them. “I’m not going to repeat those mistakes, my relationship with Farrah is very different from the one I shared with Rebecca. My wife is the person I’m going to be with forever, she fulfills me. ”

  “Do you know who the hell she left me for? Dwight Brooks!”

  “Shit,” Austin said and shook his head. Dwight Brooks was a backup guitar player for Liam Owens. He was what most guys called a womanizer, Dwight used his status in Liam’s band to bed women.

  “I wasted years on this woman that I can’t get back. I tossed my dreams aside for her,” Hank stood up and started to pace the gravel rocks. “What do I do?” he said, beating his chest.

  “Forgive.”

  Hank looked up to see Farrah standing on the porch.

  She could sense the hurt, betrayal and rage that was coursing through his body. “I made dinner for us, please come inside and out of the rain. The last thing I need is for my husband and his cousin to catch a cold.”

  “Yes ma’am,” Austin said. “We better listen to Mrs. McBride.” He draped his arm around Hank’s shoulder and walked into the house.

  Hank glanced up at the stone tutor home that held many dreams and hopes for him and Natalie. She complained about a house that most people thought of as a mini mansion, which sat on a sprawling estate. He didn’t feel like going into the house and being greeted with things that reminded him of his wife. Walking through the front door, he was surprised that the smell that filled his nostril was something spicy, instead of the light feminine perfume he prepared to smell.

  “I cooked the ground beef in the refrigerator, I thought you would love my chunky beef chili,” Farrah said, handing each of them a white plush towel. “Dinner will be ready in thirty minutes.”

  “You didn’t have to,” he said softly. “I’m going to go change clothes. Austin, you know where the extra clothing is at.”

  This was Farrah’s first time seeing the big cuddly guy being sad and upset. Standing in the large chef’s kitchen. She looked at her husband standing in front of her, wearing only a pair of blue jeans, his blonde hair wet. “Maybe we should spend the night here with Hank,” she said, as she walked over to Austin and started to dry his hair off.

  “Nope, he wouldn’t want that,” Austin said, enjoying his wife’s fingers against his skin.

  “Remember what you said the other night, when I got to veto you because you said, and I quote ‘I’m considered two people because I’m pregnant.’ Well I’m vetoing your decision not to stay the night.” She rubbed her round tummy for measures.r />
  “No honeybun, it doesn’t work like that,” Austin chuckled. “I said you can veto food choices, nice try baby.”

  “Well since you didn’t clarify yourself, my veto stands, but next time I know the veto only means for food.” She winked at him, tossing Austin the towel. Farrah walked back to the kitchen singing a happy tune.

  “You win this time Farrah McBride,” Austin laughed.

  ***

  Hank could hear them laughing in the other room. He envied what they shared together. He sat there on the bed, in the dark room, emotionally drained. His mind continued to drift back to the past three years with Natalie and the love they had. There was no value and commitment to each other. Was he destine for people to always leave him?

  Maybe he haven’t been the best husband in the world. God, how could he have been so blinded? Natalie was distant and he should’ve known she was having an affair. Picking up the photo of them at a much happier time, he threw it across the room. Glass shattered and the metal frame slid across the floor. Hank wanted to cry, he wanted to rush out the house and go after Natalie and punch the hell out of Dwight Brooks.

  A knock sounded on the door. “It’s me,” Farrah called out. “Can I come in?”

  When he didn’t say anything, the door to the bedroom creeped open slowly. He looked up to see Farrah standing in the doorway holding a tray of food. Hank could smell the steamy contents, and his stomach growled from just inhaling the smell of buttery cornbread.

  “I’m not hungry,” he lied.

  Farrah ignored him and turned on the light. Hank groaned, adjusting his eyes to the brightness. He missed the darkness, at least in the darkened room Hank didn’t have to worry about seeing everything that reminded him of Natalie.

  “Yes you are,” she said softly, sitting the tray in front of him on the night stand. “Eat and listen.”

  “No disrespect, Farrah, but I’ve been through an emotional rollercoaster tonight,” Hank mumbled.

  “There’s nothing wrong with wanting to bawl your eyes out, or rip pictures up.” She nodded to the mess on the floor.